Advice, Dating, Relationships, Uncategorized

The Little Things…

LoveRomance is dead. Sure there are spurts of it here and there but it’s not what it used to be. Nowadays it is defined by the cost of a gift or the dozen white dozes that burst out of the box as he says I love you with fireworks going off in a million different directions, don’t get me wrong, I am all for the showering of gifts, however, I don’t agree with animal abuse. Yes Valentines Day is around the corner, yes everyone is talking about it, yes your girlfriend is secretly freaking out that you won’t do something that she can brag to her friends about. If you want to spend your hard earned cash on the cute little bear that will be half the price in a weeks time go for it, I won’t stop you, but why do that when you can save your money and do something that will mean so much more? 

Everyone’s idea of romance is different, some need the big gestures whilst some run from them, I am an advocate of the little things. In support, not of Valentines Day, but of love, I have devised the following five ways you can express your feelings in your relationship. They cost little to nothing and you can do them anytime of the year.

  1. Write a letter – Why does no one write letters anymore? With social media you can Tweet, Whats App, FB Message, Insta DM, there are numerous ways to contact someone immediately but there is something to be said about receiving a handwritten letter… Take a pen and paper, sit down and write how you feel. The cost of the stamp will be cheaper than the cards available and even if you just write “will you go out with me? Yes, No, Maybe”  whoever receives your love note will appreciate the thought.
  2. Make a mix CD – Do you remember sitting in your car or laying on your bed listening to the mix tape that the boy you had a crush on made for you? Every song is cringier than the last one but knowing that he sat up all night picking the perfect songs to tell you how he feels makes you smile like a goon. Be creative with it, use the songs to tell a story, or make your own CD cover.
  3. Do something out of your comfort zone – I’m not encouraging you to incorporate whips and chains in your bedroom antics (a la 50 shades), unless of course you really want to, rather I am suggesting you do something that you know your partner will enjoy and appreciate. One friend said that she would arrange a whole motor cross weekend for her significant other, even though it makes her die a little bit inside worrying for his safety, she knows this is something he loves. If you want to do something less extreme, play on the PlayStation with him, avoid FIFA, they take that way too seriously and it will result in an argument. Try Call of Duty, if you’re anything like me, your hand-eye coordination is awful and you will spend most of the night walking around in circles staring at the ceiling but, he will secretly enjoy having to save you from the zombies. 
  4. Light a candle (or 20) – Set the mood, light candles all around the room and turn the power off, put your phone on silent and hide it for the night. No Netflix, hold the chill and get a board game out, read a book together, talk about your future plans. We spend so much time with our loved ones scrolling through social media and watching endless TV series, we are together but we couldn’t be further apart. 
  5. Make something – Whether you are barefoot in the kitchen together making dinner or painting a pretty picture the conversation and creativity will make for a fun evening. Let your boyfriend do your hair and makeup, make t-shirts together, draw funny little pictures of each other, it may not be pretty but it will be a new memory.

All the gifts and gadgets may end up broken or on eBay, but, whatever happens in your relationship, whether you last the test of time or it is a short lived romance the one thing you can both walk away with is memories. So make loads  and make them count.

S x

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Advice, Blogging, Dating, Uncategorized

All the Single Ladies

That time of year is upon us once again, everywhere you turn there are hearts and flowers, lip shaped chocolates and overly priced cards. Valentine’s Day. The one and only day in the year that you can express any romantic intentions to the object of your desire, I could delve into the reasons why I am not a fan of this day, I could point out that the origin has little to do with romance, I could go on about how it is a waste of money… But I won’t.

Valentines day may be a day for the lovers but that doesn’t mean the single people out there do not exist and cannot enjoy themselves also. 

  1. Buy yourself some sexy undies – Who says that a guy has to be the one to buy you something hot? If you’ve already got a little collection wear something from it! Don’t let it sit in your underwear drawer rotting while you don your Bridget Jones blanket, if you feel sexy you will ooze confidence, and there is nothing hotter than a confident woman.
  2. Run yourself a bubble bath – For some it’s a bubble bath with a good book and a glass of wine, for others its day at the salon getting your hair and nails done, whatever it is that makes you feel relaxed do it. And no, you can’t go and egg the house of the boy that won’t call you back, that may feel like a release but it will not relax you.
  3. Give someone else a gift – There is something deeply satisfying about giving someone a gift. Think of the people you have in your life, who has been there for you? Who is down at the moment and could do with some cheering up? 
  4. Go out – Get your single friends, get dressed up and go out. Valentines day falls on Sunday this year so go out the night before and spend the next day hung over and in your PJ’s with your friends re-hashing what happened the night before. Who knows, you might find someone special while you’re out and about.
  5. Gift yourself – Have you wanted a new pair of shoes? Maybe you’ve been eyeing a really expensive perfume lately, go get it. Treat yourself because you can and you don’t need someone else to do it for you.

Remember, it is just another day in the year but if you feel like you can’t treat it as such focus your energy elsewhere, whether that is on someone else or making yourself feel good. If all else fails do like Beyonce and dance around the room in a leotard to empowering songs about rocking your own shit.

singleladies

S x

 

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